How to Manifest Love and Success


Some people have no way to feel good about some particular issue in their life – they are blocked.
That’s where they need some help – we all need help and guidance sometimes.
We have all heard of Law of Attraction.
Most don’t know the finer points of how to manifest.
Many people say it’s about saying “positive” things. That is a shallow understanding, that’s only the first part – it carries no power.
It is important to have a positive, affirming outlook on your life and on the world, that’s true, OF COURSE!
AND THE POWER is not in the words we say, it’s about the feelings we feel.
If you aren’t feeling the feelings you want, you won’t get the things you want.
The place where most people try to use the Law of Success the most is around Money and around Love.
Here are the two most common questions I hear about money:
How do I believe that I am rich when I have no money? You can’t. That’s not the point.
How do I feel success when I have no money and the bills are piling up? AHHHH! Now you are getting closer – MUCH BETTER QUESTION!
Some people never doubt when it comes to love, when those people ask me about money and success, I tell them, “You attract money and success the same way you feel love: YOU FILL YOURSELF UP WITH IT!
Be patient in love, know it will come.
Get yourself into a state where you are OK and don’t need love from another.
Stay in that place where you are fully loving you, accepting you, full within yourself.”
Some people flow money and success easily, then they ask me about how to create the love they want.
I ask them how they create it in money and success.
Invariably, they don’t have the same fundamental blocks to success that they have with Love.
If you aren’t getting the love you want, you are blocking it in some way.
Until you allow it and work through the internal objections, the love won’t come, or it won’t stay, or it will suck to begin with.
They feel really good about money, of course worthy – they often feel thankful for their money, and they are generous – then when it comes to love they get into fear.
– Fear of loss
– fear of not being loved back
– fear of being hurt
– fear of being unworthy
So here is the formula AND IT IS SO FUCKING SIMPLE!
Feel what it would feel like to have what you want.
It really is that fucking simple!
Let go of what you can see and what you think – stay with that feeling.
Feel what it would feel like to have the love you want. Whether it is a new relationship or transforming the relationship that you already have, feel what it would be like for you to have what you want to have.
Did you hear that? Feel it AS IF YOU ALREADY HAVE IT.
It is only when you feel what you want, that you can create it.
Don’t feel the wanting. FEEL THE HAVING of it.
If you can only stay with that feeling for a few seconds, that’s OK. Feel it for a few seconds, then go watch cartoons.
Come back and feel it a few more seconds, maybe a few more than before. Keep practicing and get comfortable with that feeling.
When you are comfortable with that feeling, you won’t fight against it when it comes in the physical world.
If you get stuck, you need some help and guidance.
Be REAL. Be RAW. Make Your Life AWESOME!

You can’t build EMPOWERMENT on Judgment


“I am sorry I wasn’t pretty enough, and you needed to cheat.”

“I am sorry I wasn’t sexy enough, and you found others.”

“I am sorry I wasn’t sexual enough, and you needed to cheat.”

“I am sorry I wasn’t a good enough wife, and you needed to cheat.”

“I am sorry I wasn’t a good enough lover, and you needed to cheat.”

“I am sorry I wasn’t a good enough wife and you had to cheat.”

“I am sorry I have been so insecure about my body, and you needed to feel a woman’s excitement.”

“I am sorry I can’t shut off my brain and enjoy it when we have sex.  I feel like I failed you.”

Of course she wasn’t responsible for his affairs, but all this was going on inside of her anyway.

He didn’t blame her for his affairs.

Her insecurities led her to blame herself.

Not being able to sit with the discomfort of her insecurities, she blamed.

But she didn’t stop at blame or shy away from the pain.

(While she was saying these things, he felt like he was going to die – he was blaming himself for all her pain.)

He tried to stop her from saying all these things, I told him, “she had all these hurts and insecurities before you guys even met.”

She followed with, “Sweetie, all this stuff is what led to us being so disconnected.  We need to heal this.  I need to heal this.  I love you and we are going to be right back in the same place if we don’t do this.”


She was committed to NOT playing the part of the victim.

Only victims BLAME, COMPLAIN, and JUSTIFY.

She was committed to taking responsibility for her part in creating the whole situation, WITHOUT ABSOLVING HIM OF HIS RESPONSIBILITY.

She was committed to taking 100% responsibility for her part.

His affairs had sparked the desire to grow within her.  She realized this was a wake-up call!

It would have been easy for her to hide behind the usual victim lines:

“He’s a cheating bastard.”

“I can’t trust him.”

“I hope you have fun with your whores.”

“I can’t trust him because he betrayed me.”

“How could you do this to me?”

She said, “It would be so easy to just hate you and walk away.  But that would be taking the easy way out.”

She added, “I’m so sick of seeing women who hide behind blaming men to justify walking away from a situation THEY created by not taking care of themselves in the first place.”

I was floored!  I couldn’t have said it better myself!

We talked about the fact that whether or not they stayed together, they would be better off if they both healed their shit that led to the situation in the first place.

They agreed.

She knew that blaming him would just be SCAPEGOATING him to avoid her deeper pain and also absolve herself of her guilt for not doing what scared her the most . . . FACING HER OWN INSECURITIES!

She knew that facing her own insecurities would grow her into a strong enough woman that she could EASILY HOLD HIM ACCOUNTABLE for all the shit he had done wrong and that she could do it from a place of CONFIDENCE and POWER – NOT FROM A PLACE OF BEING BITCHY, WHINY, NAGGING, or PITIFUL.

She wanted to EMPOWER HERSELF  and from that power place EMPOWER HIM TO BE THE MAN SHE KNEW HE COULD BE.

They both acknowledged that it would have been better if they had talked openly before it ever got to this point.

And of course they both wished that he hadn’t had sex without telling her.


They both felt had felt like they were DYING INSIDE for years and didn’t know what to do.

For years, at night, she would be longing for sexual connection, masturbating to porn in the bedroom with a toy – he was longing for her and masturbating to porn in the living room.  THEY NEVER TALKED ABOUT IT.

She acknowledged that when they did have sex, she was checked out, cold, and felt like she couldn’t even enjoy it because she couldn’t shut off her brain.

She said, “I know you tried to talk about it.  I know how much you love me.  I’m sorry I couldn’t talk about it.  I couldn’t even find the words.  I know you felt like I didn’t want you and didn’t like sex with you.  I’m sorry.”

Me:  “But really you just didn’t believe there was any way that he could enjoy sex with you, right?”

She agreed.  Then said to me, as if to try and convince me, “I wanted to, I really did.  I mean look at him, he’s gorgeous, sexy, funny, brilliant, and he’s a really generous lover – better than anyone I ever met.  (He burst into tears on that one.)

He had spent years feeling like she just didn’t like him very much and almost HATING that he loved her so much even through the disconnection.

It was always that when her excitement level started getting higher than her COMFORT ZONE, her insecurities got riled up and she shut down.

He never understood this.  All he knew was they would go out to dinner they would be having a great time, then all of a sudden whenever they started getting flirty with each other . . . she would start acting like a bitch.

She felt this MASSIVE sexual energy wanting to come forth and wanted to be really SLUTTY and really FREAKY with her husband.


What if he isn’t attracted to me anymore?

What if he thinks someone else is sexier and doesn’t want me?

He’s gonna be disgusted because I am fat. (she wasn’t fat)

Maybe I don’t feel good to him, that’s why he sleeps on the couch.

He probably likes younger boobs and doesn’t like mine anymore.

He is probably grossed out by me.


He thought she was gorgeous, and she was!

She was terrified.

He told me later that he thought I was out of my mind for getting her to apologize to him for HIS affairs, but then realized that as long as she was blaming herself out of her own insecurities, they would never be able to have a straight, open, truthful discussion.

She healed.

And then seriously busted his balls WITHOUT BLAMING from a place of POWER for lying and not being strong enough to walk through her insecurities to get to her heart.

I saw this couple, who came in as emotional teenagers, transform over 6 or 7 weeks into AMAZING, WHOLE-HEARTED, SOUL-CONNECTED, FIREY LOVERS.

It was beautiful to see.

If you want the TOOLS to be able to recover from infidelity or divorce, then send me a private message and let’s get started.

Be REAL. Be RAW. Make Your Life AWESOME!

Take a Breath – FULL BODY ORGASMS!


If you want to make your lover cum harder than ever before, Just Breathe!

Let me tell you how I made my ex-wife cum three times in fast succession by taking a breath . . .

In my third year of graduate school, I took an intensive Yoga class. I thought I was taking an easy elective.

I did not realize what transformation lay ahead, that class changed the way I do therapy and it changed the way I relate in my personal life. We spent the first month of the class only learning and practicing the lower lung breath, studying under Yoga Master Nataraja Kallio.

I thought I breathed pretty well, until the class started.  I thought I had a solid meditation practice for years, but this was asking something different.

I wasn’t getting it. I wasn’t getting the breath. I wasn’t getting anything.

I was doing everything asked of me.

I was holding all the postures.

I was exaggerating my exhale to make room for something fresh and new; nothing.


In week three, something shifted.

My breath dropped down so deep that I could feel the pressure on the inside of my hip bones and tears started rolling down my face.

My therapist brain kicked in and I started thinking, “Why am I crying?  Is there something I need to process?  What is going on inside?”

I wasn’t being present anymore, I was thinking – and the tears stopped, the feeling in my stomach stopped.

I almost laughed at myself, “Hey Dumbass.  Don’t think – Just breathe.”

I started breathing again and the feeling came back. The tears kept coming,

I didn’t hear much of what was said over the next 20 minutes in the class, I just kept breathing.

Although the emotional pain was intense, feeling the pain felt better than when I had stopped breathing.

That was when I really got it!


Without the breath, we don’t get to experience the deeper reaches of our pain, we deflect.

So why was I crying?

About two weeks before this semester started, I lost a horse. This 1200 pound horse had been taken out by a mosquito; he died of West Nile Virus.

I was super busy and I never made the chance to grieve.

Three weeks into the semester, five weeks after my horse died, I’m lying on my yoga mat and the tears are pouring out of me.

The next night, I was having sex with my (then) wife.  I was on top of her and I noticed I was checked out.

I thought, “Maybe I need to pull up a fantasy to get more into it.

Then I almost laughed at myself, “Hey Dumbass.  Don’t think – Just breathe.”

As I started to take a deep belly breath, I felt my stomach press into hers.  And I stopped.

I thought, “Oh, God.  She’s gonna think I am fat.”

Then I almost laughed at myself, “Hey Dumbass.  Don’t think – Just breathe.”

As I took a deep belly breath, I ignored by stomach pressing on hers.  I only allowed me to feel my love for her.

I felt me, I felt her, I imagined that my heart was reaching all the way into her chest and wrapping her heart in love – honoring her for the incredible woman she was, honoring the Goddess in her.

I imagined that the energy of hmy heart filled every inch of my body and I imagined that the energy of my love came all the way oskin to touch her deep inside, every place that our bodies were touching . . .

To this day, I don’t remember if I was still moving my cock inside of her or not, the only part I know is that I was loving the ever living shit out of her!

She instantly had 3 orgasms in rapid succession!

Afterward she asked, “Sweetie, I’m not complaining at all, but I need to ask you something. . . WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME?!!!!!?!!!!!?!!!!!”

(Feigning innocence) “What do you mean?  I was just loving you . . . ”

She said, “Well it worked!”

Over the years, this technique of breathing and feeling my heart, imagining that my heart is wrapping her heart in love is one of my favorites.

It has brought women to tears – opened their hearts to heal old hurts buried for way too long.

It has brought ME to tears!

It has helped me to feel the vulnerability necessary to feel deeply loved.

It has allowed the love of the Divine to flow through me in creating beautiful experiences.

It has helped facilitate some beautiful love to be made!

I invite you to try it!

One of the most awesome parts of what I do is to teach couples to unleash the firey, playfulness of the deepest, most sacred connections they long for sexually.

We all want great sex!  And when people are willing to dance into their own vulnerability, sex can become truly transformational – all it takes is some training . . .

One of the most important – actually it is VITAL – things to do is to learn the emotional foundation and the communication skills, as well as the spiritual presence necessary to make this kind of sexual presence possible.

The easiest way to learn all the foundational pieces to transform your relationship and create the heart and presence to make this kind of love is to go through the Pillars of Awesome Relationships Video Training.

Go take a breath and make somebody’s night!

Be REAL. Be RAW. Make Your Life AWESOME!

How to have Mind-Blowing, Soul-expanding SEX!

Emotionally connected SEX
Heart-opening SEX
Soul-expanding SEX
Body-shaking SEX
Love-exploding SEX
Limit-shattering SEX
Divinely tender SEX
Freakishly raw SEX
Scarily vulnerable SEX


After covering a lot of the emotional foundations of connection and emotional intimacy in earlier videos, Module 5 dives into how to have that kind of sex!!

When you have the TOOLS in your emotional, spiritual, and communication toolbox, BLISS, BLESSING, and CONNECTION become your playground!

As you know, you have to have the right tool for the right job!

Check out this video training to build the foundation and learn the TOOLS!

Pillars of Awesome Relationships Video Training – Only $97!

Learning to be your most badass, big-hearted, emotionally available self is one hell of a journey AND YOU CAN SPEED IT UP WITH THIS TRAINING!


Do yourself a favor – invest in your love life – be a lover worth being with!

Pillars of Awesome Relationships Video Training – Only $97!

Be REAL. Be RAW. Make Your Life AWESOME!

He’s acting like an ASS! What do you do?



Time and time and time again I’ve had women come into my office and tell me that they have NO DESIRE to have sex EVER AGAIN!

The thing is:  These are not ASEXUAL women.

They are actually very sensuous women!


When women, don’t feel SEEN, MET, HONORED – when they feel like they are not being treated well, they start to shut down to their men, of course.

Sometimes their desire shuts down for THAT man, sometimes not – BUT IT IS NOT DEAD, If you aren’t feeling it, your desire is just asleep.

Not only do you have feeling like you aren’t seen, met, honored .  .  . But add to that getting the message growing up that girls who like sex and have a lot of sex are SLUTS!

It becomes scary to want sex if it’s not flowing naturally, so your natural desire puts you into the slut category, so you dare not embrace it.

You wind up with quite a mess to clean up inside . . .

Crying doesn’t work.
Whining doesn’t work.
Complaining doesn’t work.


How do you set boundaries with your man without his defenses going up?

You love him.

You can’t kill him.

Divorce is such a pain in the ass . . .

It seems so simple, all you want him to do is bring his HEART!  That’s not too much to ask, is it?

Well, do you want the good news or the bad news?

The good news is that there’s a really, really good chance you’ll get what you really want.

The bad news?  You have to become the woman you have always dreamed of being to get it.

You were born to be a GODDESS.

You were born to feel your heart in the biggest way.

You were born to feel love flowing through you, not just when he is being affectionate, but all the time!


How would a CONFIDENT woman respond when she is met with coldness or harshness?

How would a woman with a strong, open heart respond if she knew she couldn’t fail?


How does a Goddess handle it when she is treated less that Divinely?

Be REAL. Be RAW. Make Your Life AWESOME!